I don't feel good. Hive Girl is making a recovery - although she still has hives. My oldest teenager has worn me out. Last night was the latest round, and because I wouldn't allow him to go outside - at 9 pm, 20* outside - to meet with a kid who just got out of juvie (and is a well known drug user/dealer), he flipped out. He pulled a knife on himself - and every time I would say he could not go meet this nefarious punk, he would cut his wrist.

Before I get a bunch of comments and email about what a horrible parent I am, let me make this quick point: he's been diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar. We've been in therapy since he was 2 1/2 - he's almost 17. He's been hospitalized 7-9 times in the psych ward. I have to call the police on him when he becomes violent. I've been through this with him countless times - and the "cuts" he was making on his wrist were extremely superficial, most not even breaking the skin like a scratch would. As a former paramedic, I know what the laws a current mom, I know what needs. That is not said to be arrogant - this is just so cyclic with him, I know how the ordeal works. I also know what calms the situation down...and what escalates it.

I didn't mean to go off on that lil' tangent...but I really don't want a bunch of comments/emails saying he should be hospitalized, he has issues, etc. I'm already aware of these things - remember, I've done this dance for about 14 years. And I've done it all on my own - not like I had his father or a husband involved, or to lean on.

So...he's worn me out. I'm sure the stress is what's gotten me sick...but I feel something akin to something really rotten. (I'll spare you the mental image I was going to paint - I don't want anyone spitting Corn Flakes or Diet Coke on their screen. Or having nightmares.) I'm going back to bed.

Before I retire to the Royal Rubber Room (aka master bedroom) of Castle Crazy, I wanted to share something I feel is important. Most of my buddies who read my blog, write blogs themselves. While checking out Mama Asid's ENTREPOD blog today, I came across an informative post. "How bout a Lil Bad Behaviour, Honey" should be required reading for anyone running a website - whether you run/own a domain, write a blog on Blogger or Wordpress, or program websites in any form or fashion.

Mama Asid, aka Re, is a wonderful person - with talent coming out of every pore she has. She's a talented BadGals Radio Wonder Woman, podcaster, amazing blogger, wonderful website designer, and just all-around "more smarter than me" - especially in reference to running great websites that are clean, informative, tackle interesting issues, and frequently updated. Basically, she's the Super Woman I aspire to be. I have no idea where she gets all the hours in the day - or how she's learned all this stuff...but she has. Plus, she has a heart of gold...and she shares all this knowledge freely. Awesome!

Read the post I linked to. I'll admit I don't fully understand it - but I'm smart enough to know it's important. I've followed her advice - and in the spirit of wanting to help and protect my blogging buddies, I think it's worth your time and consideration, too.

That ends my Public Service Announcement for the day. Go about your business...I'm going back to bed. I apologize in advance for not sprinkling this post with pictures. You can find a beautiful picture of a flower on Re's post I pointed you to.


14 Royal Responses:

Ann said...

I hope you're feeling better soon. And thank you for not getting too detailed, I was drinking a coke while I was reading and would hate to have it all over my keyboard. Take care of yourself.

Lin said...

And I'll just send a big hug with no judgements whatsoever. It is hard being a parent of teens. Hang in there.

RE-Entrepod said...

Queenie, You are So Sweet I gain a pound everytime I come by here..

hey tell your son I said he needs to stop all that wasting time and go ahead and start whittling himself a wooden gun. then he can make himself some wooden bullets. at that point I'm so sure that he will have a buyer for it that he'll be so busy making more that he will no longer be interested in whittling himself.

whoo ha ! and tell that youngin that I said he ain't foolin nobody, he's an aspiring butcher so get ta huntin. you know how to cook crow right ? mwwwahhhhhh !!!!!

huggies sugarpie. obtw next week we talk all about firefox and the nasty games browsers play.
hope you stop by and check it out.

Promotional Printing said...

You are a good mom I know and a brave one too. You just want the best for your son and for sure you will not do anything to hurt him. I hope you be both fine. God Bless!

Ruth said...

Sorry to hear your son's giving you grief, now I don't feel so bad about my ADHDer/Aspie DS fighting me to get off the computer every night! Hope everything gets better soon.

Maybe he needs his meds checked? Comorbid Bipolar/ADHD can be really tough, I've heard that ADHD meds in a kid with uncontrolled (or poorly controlled) Bipolar can make them a lot worse. Hang in there!

FishHawk said...

Oh my, I read about this last episode with your oldest son in absolute horror. To be completely honest about it, I don't know what I would have done in a situation like that. Okay, yeah, I do too know how I would have probably handled it, and it would have probably made things a lot worse. I feel for you, my dear. I really do.

Anonymous said...

Katherine -

You are such a strong woman I have known for quite some time now. I would never judge you and feel sorry for the sorry lad/lass who would. they clearly don't know you like your friends do. You have been through so much over the years...this is what the judgmental one's don't see. I would dare to see how they would respond had they walked a mile in your shoes and suffered the tribulations that you have.

You know what, Girlie, the only people who's opinion matters to you should be yours. Don't forget that.

Missing you as I have had not much blog-surfing time lately :)

Katherine (a.k.a. Katie) Corrigan said...

Hello, I’m just stopping by to say thanks for your continued participation. I have you listed on my “Favorite Places” page at my blog. Hugs! Katherine

AngelBaby said...

Oh do I sympathize with you. One of my children was one of those teenagers that drive a parent crazy. It is so frustrating and so hard to take and then there are the other parents that look at you like what did you do. Well she did eventually straighten out and now is just wonderful, I am lucky. It is just life and sometimes hard to take. My heart goes out to you and I do hope you feel better soon. I am sending you some Angels to love and comfort you.

Hope you have a much better day!

Love and Blessings,

vhf said...

Oh, I didn't know about your ds :*( You need tons of cyber {{{{hugs}}}}!! Hope it's better soon.

Cindy Wick said...

I'm so sorry. I have 6 kids but only the oldest was rebelious like what you are going through. He actually DID turn out, lol. Took a few years though. I am a Christian, and I remember thinking when we were going through this with him that I knew what hell was. :D One thing though ~ he was so terrible that it cured the rest of them! Not one squeek of problems now and we have a whole houseful of teens. So I guess there was a silver lining.

And I have to say ~ Good FOR YOU for not caving to the drama!! It takes guts (and like you said, people can be so judgemental) to call their bluff. Ours had just attempted suicide when he tried the "if you don't let me, I'll really do it next time" line on me. I told him my answer was still no, and that I would miss him when he was gone! :D So you keep it up, he'll get older and this won't be forever.


Cindy (from the transfer list ~ and I'm checking out that paper! :)

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seo sydney said...

Your blog seems exciting. I hope if I were there. I am overwhelmed with your depiction. Your blog have such a more useful views on PSA. Super. Thanks for sharing this post so much.

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